A Night Owl Slips into a Diner: A Noir Urban Fantasy by Douglas Lumsden

Author:Douglas Lumsden [Lumsden, Douglas]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-12-14T23:00:00+00:00

***

As the wind gusted off the water, I heard the calling of birds back near the shore. I wondered what kind of bird hunted near the ocean at this time of night. They didn’t sound like seagulls. They sounded more like… owls. But at that moment, birds were the last thing on my mind.

My eyes were still locked with Ralph’s. “I said—”

“Never mind, I heard what you said.” Ralph looked back down toward the entrance to the pier, straining his senses to detect any suspicious movements or sounds. Apparently, he’d also heard the birdcalls. After a shake of his head, he tightened the drawstrings of his hood and looked up at me. “Alkwat’s balls! Where did you hear about the boy who talks backwards?”

I studied the nirumbee, trying to decide how much I wanted to tell him. “It’s an odd story.”

“I’m listening.”

I was still hesitant. “If I tell you, you have to help me understand a few things that aren’t clear to me.”

Ralph nodded. “I’ll do what I can.”

“All right. A couple of days ago, I took a little journey without leaving my chair. A very strange woman blew smoke up my nose, and the next thing I knew I was sitting next to a waterfall in the jungle. You with me so far?”

The nirumbee’s eyes narrowed. “Go on.”

“A cougar the size of a pickup truck came up to me and started talking in my head. He gave me a new name: Speaks with Wind. In return for the name, he asked me to take care of the boy who talks backwards.”

Ralph pulled out another of his cigars and lit it up, first try. Impressive, given the way the wind was beginning to whip. Smoke rolled out of his mouth as he asked, “And it was Cougar that spoke to you?”

I had thought that Ralph might have trouble believing my story, but I should have known better. Like Walks in Cloud, he was descended from a people with strong ties to an ancient past. “The strange woman I mentioned explained that I had been on a quest, and that Cougar had chosen to be my spirit animal.”

Ralph frowned. “Cougar. I’ll be damned.” His lips twisted into a wry smile. “I was chosen by Badger. That vision drug is some shit, am I right? I guess we’ll be all right as long as you don’t get in my face.” He stuck the cigar into the corner of his smile.

I waved away the smoke that rose to my nostrils. “Lord’s balls, man! What the hell is that garbage? It smells like old socks.”

Ralph pulled the cigar out of his mouth and studied it. “This? The leaf comes from a type of laurel tree that grows in the Baahpuuo Mountains. It’s seasoned with kinnikinnick made from bearberry oil and some other shit. I’d give you some, but you’d probably fly off on another visit with the spirits, and now’s not the time for that.”

“Great. So what do you know about this boy that I’m supposed to be taking care of? Deet flipped out when I mentioned him.

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